Wow, a lot has happened in the past few, for one thing I am NO LONGER and ex-pat!
ha ha… and not a moment too soon. Ex-pat life was getting to me in ways you can’t even imagine. It’s a relief to be done with that place. I never felt home. I never felt at-ease, not completely.
My leaving was bittersweet. I haven’t been able to come into focus on a lot of things. I have grown so much over the past few years. There were some important milestones that I reached while living abroad (this time). All of that is not behind me.
But the experience took a heck of a lot out of me too. It’s like the older, wiser me, still has plenty of battle scars. I wonder what this will mean for me and life adjusting back into being an American. I’m living in the US, but in a different place than I have lived before, and trying to navigate life as the “new” girl. It was just three years ago that I was excited about moving to the UAE and giving this American life the big eff you… ha ha.
Maybe worst of all, somewhere along the way, I lost my will to write. I still can’t tell if it was because of self-sensorship, or just working full time or what. Maybe I just didn’t have anything to tell you all.
The urge to write something, to force myself to write something came today as I finally removed the last vestiges of my life there from my life here. A few FB friend deletes aside, I should be good to go in a very little while… ha ha.
So what happened?
Alhamdullilah for the past… now I look forward to the future.